How A Good Self-Help Programme Can Be The Best Answer to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a type of anxiety disorder which compels the mind to act out of compulsion or obsession. Excessive thoughts or obsessions that lead to repetitive behaviors or compulsions.
People with OCD tend to stay away from their normal lives. It is a common, chronic and long-lasting disorder and characterized by uncontrollable, unwanted thoughts and sometime ritualized, repetitive behaviors, they feel compelled to perform. Some patients recognize that obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors are irrational - but even so they feel unable to resist those thoughts and take corrective actions.

Signs and Symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

People with OCD may have symptoms of obsessions, compulsions or both. These symptoms can cause serious interface into all aspects of life that include work, study, interpersonal relationships.

  Some common signs and symptoms that shape OCD are:

• Hesitation and agitation, includes constant irritating movements of hands and legs (picking of hair, biting of nails, shaking legs)
• Person may use a irritation movement as a coping mechanism on a daily basis
• Inability to focus, mind may be seen to be wondering
• Feeling isolated or helpless
• Performing compulsive rituals out of habit without a fail
• People with OCD are quite aware of the fact that they are letting their minds control their actions yet still feel the urge to continue what they are doing, this causes anxiety
• People with OCD tend to check thing repeatedly to make sure everything is correct

However to be more specific these symptoms can be divided into two parameters

Common Obsessive Thoughts :

• Fear of Germs or contamination
• Unwanted, forbidden or taboo thoughts involving  religion and harming themselves or others
• Intrusive sexually explicit violent thoughts or images
• Aggressive thoughts towards others or self
• Fear of losing or not having things that may be or may not be needed
• Excessive focus on religious or moral ideas or even towards a person
• Symmetry or having things in perfect order

Common Compulsive Behaviors :

• Excessive cleaning or washing of hands
• Repeatedly checking of loved ones 
• Repetitive counting, checking, tapping, ordering and arranging things
• Accumulating junk such as newspaper, old cloths, empty containers etc.

 

OCD is not a personality issue

Most importantly Obsessive Compulsive Disorder should not be mistaken with personality issue. A person might be very careful and check things more thoroughly than most others. She/he may be perfectionist and has very high standards about certain things. Usually these tendencies do not cause great problems

With OCD it is very different - typically OCD starts gradually and can be minor irritation over the years, eventually getting to a point where symptoms can no longer be denied.

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OCD is an unusual and sometimes frightening condition. Many of us afraid on people with OCD are going mad and completely losing control of themselves. This does not happen. OCD also does not lead to other severe illness, like schizophrenia, but for some it can be just as disabling.

What really underlies OCD ?

Confusing imagination with reality and being out of contact with reality are linked to OCD, a new study finds. 
People with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder are known to dissociate themselves from reality.
Instead they rely heavily on their imagination.
A study based on survey on 75 people with OCD found that they experienced inferential confusion : essentially getting fantasy and reality mixed up.
Frederick Aardema, PhD  of the University of Montreal, said in a press release

Theories about OCD stipulate that it is not the content of thought that is involved in the development of obsessions but the way these thoughts are interpreted by the person. While most people will dismiss an idea if they feel it has no meaning, people with OCD will say that if they think that way they must be a reason  

Dr Aardema also said

It seems that people with OCD are so absorbed by their obsession due to inferential confusion that there is a break with reality.

Specifically, we found that individuals no longer rely on their sensory perceptions or common sense but on their imagination.

For example, they are afraid that their hands are contaminated with germs, so they wash them over and over again because they are convinced that their hands are dirty even though they are visibly clean

Ms Stella-Marie Paradisis, First author of the study, explained the nature of  inferential confusion

First, inferential confusion is a reasoning process in which obsessive doubt takes hold.

Individuals make subjective connections between different elements.

For example, the person believes that the water in a municipal swimming pool is contaminated because chlorine has been put into it, so inevitably there are bacteria in the water.

Second, schizo-typical personality is characterized by bizarre ideas, rigid belief, lack of discernment, and a tendency to over-rely on imagination.

For example, individuals are convinced that what they hear on the news or read in the newspaper concerns them personally and directly.

Finally, dissociation is characterized by loss of contact with reality and memory lapses in certain situations — a phenomenon that can be observed especially in people who display checking behavior.

Some people feel that they can behave so differently depending on the situation that they are two different people.

 The study was published in the Journal of Clinical Psychology on 7th April 2015

Risk Factors

OCD starts usually during childhood or in teenage. Most of the cases people are diagnosed by about age 19, typically with an earlier age of onset in boys than in girls, but onset after age 35 does happen. In the date chart  shows  Prevalence of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Among Adults and its occurrence.


The causes of OCD are unknown but following factors are considered as risks based on the various studies :

Genetics

Research shows that OCD does run in families and that genes likely
play a role in the development of the disorder. Genes appear to be only
partly responsible for causing the disorder though. No one really knows
what other factors might be involved, perhaps an illness or even ordinary
life stresses that may induce the activity of genes associated with the
symptoms of OCD.
Some experts think that OCD that begins in childhood may be different
from the OCD that begins in adults. For example, a recent review of twin
studies has shown that genes play a larger role when OCD starts in childhood (45-65%) compared to when it starts in adulthood (27-47%) 

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 Brain Structure and Functioning

Research and imaging studies suggest that OCD involves problems in communication between the front part of the brain and deeper structures.These brain structures use a chemical messenger called serotonin. Pictures of the brain at work also show that in some people, the brain circuits involved in OCD become more normal with either serotonin medicines or cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) .

There are no laboratory or brain imaging tests to diagnose OCD. The diagnosis is made based on the observation and assessment of the person’s symptoms.

Environment

People who have experienced abuse (physical or sexual) in childhood or other trauma are at an increased risk for developing OCD.
In some cases, children may develop OCD or OCD symptoms following a streptococcal infection—this is called Pediatric Autoimmune Neuro-psychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections (PANDAS).A child may be diagnosed with PANDAS when :

• Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) and/or tic disorders suddenly appear following a strep infection (such as strep throat or scarlet fever); or
• The symptoms of OCD or tic symptoms suddenly become worse following a strep infection.

The symptoms are usually dramatic, happen “overnight and out of the blue,” and can include motor and/or vocal tics, obsessions, and/or compulsions. In addition to these symptoms, children may also become moody or irritable, experience anxiety attacks, or show concerns about separating from parents or loved ones.

Common Obstacles to effective treatment of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

• Studies find that it takes an average 14 to 17 years from the time OCD begins for people to obtain appropriate treatment.

• Some people choose to hide their symptoms, often in fear of embarrassment or stigma. Therefore, many people with OCD do not seek the help of a mental health professional until many years after the onset of symptoms.

• Until recently, there was less public awareness of OCD , so many people were unaware that their symptoms represented an illness that could be treated.

• Lack of proper training by some health professionals often leads to the wrong diagnosis. Some patients with OCD symptoms will see several doctors and spend several years in treatment before receiving a correct diagnosis.

• Difficulty finding local therapists who can effectively treat OCD.

• Not being able to afford proper treatment. 

Treatments 

OCD is typically treated with medication, psychotherapy or a combination of the two. However this topic about Self-Help, I am therefore not elaborating further on this.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - Self-Help 

Obsessions and compulsions can take the life of the persons with it and leave them feeling helpless. No matter how overwhelming the problems are, there are many ways , they can help themselves. Of-course family members, peers and friends have a greater part to overcome the stress, anxiety and other related problems of OCD.   

Helping someone with OCD

The way we react to a person with OCD symptoms have a big impact on their outlook and recovery. Normally we see them in a way that the patient is doing or making mistakes willingly. This is not the case.  Negative comments , criticism and hatred can make OCD worse, while a calm, supportive environment can help to improve the outcome of the treatment.

Photo by Cherry Laithang on Unsplash

• Most importantly they need help - OCD behaviors are symptoms not character flaws so avoid criticism    

• As per the characteristics of the OCD behaviors, it is absolutely not possible for someone with OCD to comply with normal behavior. They tend to the rituals by their symptomatic instinct. In this case scolding them makes the OCD worse. Sympathetic approach is the best way forward.

• Be as kind and patient as possible - They need to overcome problems at their own pace. Praising their effort to overcome OCD and giving importance to their positive aspects of their life make them comfortable. Anxiety and hopelessness are normal and adaptive in nature. Therefore, dealing with those, never involves eliminating it rather managing it.

• Do not play with the sufferer's rituals -  Helping with rituals will only reinforce the behavior. Support the person not the rituals.

• Communication is important. Keep communication clear, positive and balance  between supporting and standing up to the OCD symptoms, not further distressing the life of the sufferer.

• Find the humor - laughing together over the funny things and absurdity of some OCD symptoms can help them deal and detach themselves from the disorder. It is very very important that the sufferer feels respected and in on the joke.

• Don't let OCD take over our family life - sit down as a family and decide how we can work together to tackle our loved one's symptoms. We must try to keep family life as normal as possible and the home a low-stress environment.

Programming Self-Help to overcome disorders

Yes it is very difficult for a suffer to take part in Self-assessment and does the corrective actions on their own. Family members and friends need to take significant role to draw the plan and make them implemented carefully into the life of the person with OCD.

Learning how to eliminate OCD rituals

It might seem smart to avoid the situations that trigger obsessive thoughts, but more the sufferer avoids them, the scarier they feel. Instead expose them to their OCD triggers, then try to resist or delay the urge to complete their relief-seeking compulsive rituals. If the resistance gets to be too hard, try to reduce the amount of time spend on their ritual. The calculated exposures to the triggers always reduce anxiety and make us less vulnerable each time. Fundamentally in course of time those triggers loose their impact in their outlook.

Anticipate OCD urges

If we study pattern and timing of the OCD urges, we can easily find something and timing that  trigger compulsions. Make a note and try to change the pattern so that they make less or cannot impact the behavior. At the same time create a solid mental picture then make a mental note that those are just a obsessive thoughts.

Challenge obsessive thoughts

Almost all of us face troubling thoughts and worries time to time. But obsessive compulsive disorder causes the brain stuck on a particular anxiety-proving thought, causing it play over and over in the sufferer's mind. To overcome the situation Journaling is the best way forward.                

Keep writing whatever comes into the mind, aiming to write in details even if the same words, phrases or the same urges come over and over.

• Writing will help to see how the repetitive the obsessions are.

• Writing down same words, phrases and thoughts hundreds of times will help to lose its power.

• Writing thoughts down is much harder work than simply thinking, so it is likely, the obsessive thoughts are disappear sooner than expected.

Create an OCD worry period

It is always helpful to be appreciative rather than suppressive. OCD thoughts cannot be ignored, instead when a sufferer accommodates the thoughts in a particular time to think about the urges, the subconscious mind comes into play.
Fix one or two time frame say for 10 to 15 minutes when the sufferers can think about their worries, anxieties. Family members should help them in the process. Speak out, think on the urges. At the end of the period take some long breaths and deliberately engage to other things. If this process work for 3 weeks it will be automatic and mind will train itself to the time-limit for worrying and subsequently other works gradually become urge free and normal.

Take Help of Quantum Sound

I am a big fan of this technique. We consciously or unconsciously react to the sounds that enter into our ears. Think of a sound you are now hearing, it may be soothing, blissful, noisy, irritable, we may want to ignore or to hear more consciously. Every sound wave is responsible for some degrees of reaction.
Find one or two sounds may be a mantra which gives blissful reaction to the sufferer of OCD, play it in low volume so that the sufferer need extra effort to hear consciously. Do this for few times every day. The early morning hours and before taking bed at the night are very good for raising our vibrational frequency and elevate our emotional well-being.

The Om Mantra I have chosen here. You can choose on your own whatever you think if that is helpful and blissful.

Lifestyle Modification

A healthy and balanced lifestyle plays a big role to counter anxiety and other related disorders.

Make sure that we exercise regularly

It is common for all of us.
Exercise is a natural and effective anti-anxiety treatment that helps to control OCD Symptoms by refocusing our mind. For maximum benefit try some guided aerobic exercise for about 20 minutes. When we pay mindful attention to the exercise process and our breathing pattern, our body and mind get significant relaxation.      

Get enough sleep

Anxiety and worry are the primary cause of insomnia. Think opposite, adequate sleep prevents anxiety and worry, When we maintain our sleep well, it's much easier to keep our emotion balanced. a key factor in coping with anxiety disorders such as OCD.

Avoid alcohol and nicotine 

These may give some temporary relief but it is proven clinically that alcohol and nicotine aggravate OCD symptoms.

Reach out for Support

OCD can get worse when the sufferer feel sidelined and stay alone.  It's important to build a support system  More connected the sufferers, the less vulnerable they'll feel. There are support groups available for people with OCD. They can be approached for any help and guidance.

 

 

These are some links that provide helps

How can I help myself?

SELF-HELP: MANAGING YOUR OCD AT HOME

What to Do During Obsessing and Stopping Your Compulsions – Offers self-help skills you can practice on your own and use to combat obsessions and compulsions. (Anxieties.com)

Family, Friends and Carers – Information on how to take care of yourself while helping a loved one with obsessive-compulsive disorder. (OCD UK)

Help for Partners and Families – Advice on how to support a loved one with obsessive-compulsive disorder. (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health)

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Symptoms, Treatment, and Self-Help             
 Find a Support Group – A searchable database of OCD support groups. (International OCD Foundation) 


Baul Mon - A Center for Human mind with facility for indoor treatment of  Psychiatric Patients and Addicts          
mon KE niye - A Center that offers treatment without medicine. 
 

Take it easy. Don't allow OCD to rule a life. With little care OCD can be controlled and eliminated. Get well soon.
 
           

   

   

Slowing Down is the Smartest Way to increase Happiness Quotient

The Slow philosophy is not about doing everything in a snail's pace. Not it is a Luddite attempt to drag the whole planet back to some per-industrial utopia. On the contrary, the movement is made up of people like you and me, people who want to live better in a fast-paced, modern world   - Photo by Daniel Monteiro on Unsplash

We live in a time when things are moving so fast that many of us have difficulty living our lives in more full and meaningful ways. We find it almost impossible to slow down, mainly because there is a cultural taboo against it. In contemporary society, the expression 'slowing down' implies laziness, inertia or slacking off on the part of the individual who chooses to decelerate. Words such as 'fast' and 'slow' are powerful connotations projecting societal values. Take for example, a person who is fast; she/he is presumed to be someone who can accomplish more in less time. The faster one can produce, the further ahead she/he can get in their profession. On the other hand, a person who is habitually slow accomplishes less and in all likelihood won't be successful in life.

Happiness Quotient

On the other hand happiness quotient is the measure of presence or degree of happiness in a person. But it is not always depend upon on an individual. In this complex, interrelated and interdependent

Photo by Tanja Heffner on Unsplash

world, external factors play a decisive role in one's being happy or not. But that does not mean there is no control in hand. There is, and an individual who understands the dynamics of societal functions also understands the ways to cope up with thorny issues. She/he learns to remain floating even in the worst disasters. So it is clear that Happiness Quotient is relative and achievable.

  

Unhealthy Working Practices

It is against contemporary capitalism that extols the virtues of speed, productivity and accumulation of wealth that we find increasingly difficult to practice what Gandhi believed

there is more life than increasing its speed

We seldom ponder the human cost of capitalism. In the relentless pursuit of speed, efficiency and material possessions we end up spending inordinate amounts of time in modern-day exhaustion, which frequently make us error prone, angry, depressed and ill. Millions all over the world now pop pills to seek relief from stress, insomnia, hypertension, migraines, gastrointestinal problems, to name but a few, all brought on by unhealthy working practices. Even young people in 30s are now experiencing high burnout from this frenzied world of work.

Karoshi

The work ethic of high speed and ruthless efficiency probably has had the worst impact in Japan where the locals have word in Japanese for death by overwork, which is called Karoshi. Although the Japanese Government recently reported that there have been 143 victims of Karoshi, many work groups have put the death toll from overwork in Japan in the thousands. In order to keep up with the fast paced world of business, some people even more coffee just to survive. Potent stimulants like amphetamines have become quite popular among many white-color professionals across the world. They use these stimulants to get a euphoric feeling and alertness that usually lasts for most of one's workday. The side effects of amphetamines are several. They are very addictive and users of this stimulant come down with acute depression, anxiety and violent behavior. The contemporary work culture of haste has also affected our mental and emotional health.

Time Sickness

In 1982, Dr Larry Dossey ,an American Physician, coined the term 'time sickness' to explain the   

Dr Larry Dossey PC his official website

obsessive concern we have about time, which we think is always fleeting ; there isn't enough of it. So we need to go faster to keep up. If we use use Dossey's term. then quite possibly most of the whole world is suffering from time sickness. Many of us have become obsessed about losing time that we desperately try to save every last scarp of it in order to get our things accomplished. In the recent past, Klaus Schwab, founder and president of World Economic Forum, emphasized in the most blunt terms the importance of speed in contemporary societies,

We are moving from a world in which the big eat the small to one in which the fast eat the slow

Everywhere we go we find a mad race against the clock. According to the British psychologist Guy Claxton, living a life of acceleration has become second nature to us, Claxton is of the opinion that

we have developed an inner psychology of speed, of saving time and maximizing efficiency, which is getting stronger by the day.

Superficial Living

Living in a world of speed has rendered our life superficial in several important ways. When we are in haste, we can only focus at a surface level without having the time to go deep. We are unable to make genuine connections with either people or the world around us. We are in such a hurry that we often forget to fully appreciate the food we are eating or the people with whom we are interacting or places we are visiting. We are either texting, looking at the screen on our smart phones or busy taking selfies or other pictures to post immediately on social media. In this busy bustling times, we seem to have lost the art of taking. It slowly shutting out all the background noise and distractions and simply enjoying the stillness of the moment. In his novella, Stillness, Milan Kundera has warned us in no uncertain terms, about the downside of leading fast life

When things happen too fast, nobody can be certain about anything at all, not even about himself

Slow Movement

The slow movement, which is about promoting slowing down the pace of life, has started in several

Carlo Petrini

cities, especially in Western Europe. This movement was started in 1986 by Carlo Petrini who protested against the opening of a McDonald's restaurant in Piazza di Spagna in Rome. Petrini's protest sparked the creation of slow food movement . Over time, the slow food movement became an important part of the sun-culture, which impacted several important facets of human life.


 


In 2004, Carl Honore wrote his best selling non-fiction  In praise of Slowness, where he describe the Slow Movement thus:

The Slow philosophy is not about doing everything in a snail's pace. Not it is a Luddite attempt to drag the whole planet back to some per-industrial utopia. On the contrary, the movement is made up of people like you and me, people who want to live better in a fast-paced, modern world. This is why the Slow Philosophy can be summed up in a single word : balance. Be fast when it makes sense to be fast and be slow when slowness is called for. Seek to live at what musicians call the tempo giusto - the right speed.

The Slow Movement is not  organized by any single group. People who are genuinely interested in expanding the movement beyond Europe, run the movement. Now the popularity of this movement can be seen in the United States, Australia and even in Japan. The Slow Movement has had a big impact in several areas of our lives such as Cinema, Food, Living Style, Travel and much more.

Cinema  

Slow films characteristically consist of resistance to rapid movements and intense emotion and devotion to realism. This is accomplished by long takes, slow camera movements, unconventional  use of music and sparse editing. Extensive studies on the art(s) of Slow Cinema are gaining momentum.

Food 

Slow Movement is completely opposed to the idea of fast food. Under Slow Movement, food is produced organically and prepared in traditional ways all for the promotion of good health and complete enjoyment. The slow food needs to be consumed in a leisurely way savoring every morsel.

Living Style

This involves making conscious decisions about structuring one's life to give a sense of meaning and fulfillment. It emphasizes quality rather than quantity.

PC StockSnap

Travel

Slow travel is not about traveling from one location to another. It is about immersing oneself in the cultural milieu of that place. It involves staying in the same place for a while to establish meaningful connections with that place and its people. The mantra is taking one's time to soak in the experience without the slightest hurry in the world.

Photo by Robert Metz on Unsplash

           
The Slow Movement is about slowing down to savor what we eat, how we travel, how we consume, how we produce and most importantly how we live. The slow movement exhorts us to practice stillness, contemplate, relax, spend quality time with family and friends and let our minds and interactions wander without the constraints of time. Although there is pressure in prevailing socioeconomic conditions, however we can certainly embrace many of the values that are espoused by the Slow Movement either on an individual level or collectively as a family. Some of these lessons include :

1. Stop rushing through life so fast that we forget who we are
2. Stop using turbo-speed in every thing that we do. Use judgement when it's okay to apply speed and when it is not.
3. Stop doing everything all at once and instead, become more present and mindful.
4. Slow down to locate the energy in us to make meaningful connections with the world we live in.

Final Thought

Now is the time to decide what kind of a life we want for ourselves - a life of maddening speed, which is aggressive, controlling, superficial, stressed and impatient, or a life that can be calm, receptive, intuitive, patient, reflective, helping us establish meaningful connections with work, people, culture and food- pretty much everything. The choice is clearly ours. In the words of the former Prime Minister of Israel, Golda Meir, we can learn how to

-- govern the clock . not be governed by it.

            

                        

In Giving We receive - a practice that breaks our persona

Every act of obedience recognizes that there is a higher authority in our lives.. that there is Lord over us who is entitled to honor and respect 
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Carl Jung,   the Swish psychiatrist defines the word persona as

a kind of mask, designed on the one hand to make a definitive impression upon others, and on the other to conceal the true nature of the individual.

To be in the highly demanding social atmosphere we often try hard  to develop a viable social persona, knowingly or unknowingly, consciously or unconsciously: a flexible persona relates to the outside world, in identification with our professional presence which inhibits psychological development. A professor identifies himself with textbooks, a state minister thinks her/his state as her/his own political party, a factory manager draws her/his all attention towards her/his organizations budgetary obligations, so on so forth. Thus Jung argues in his book 

^Memories, Dreams, Reflections (London 1983) p 416. 

The result could be

the shallow, brittle, conformist kind of personality which is 'all persona', with its excessive concern for 'what people think'.

 ^Anthony Stevens - On Jung (London 1990) p 43

- an deflective state of mind

in which people are utterly unconscious of any distinction between themselves and the world in which they live. They have little or no concept of themselves as beings distinct from what society expects of them.

  ^ Terence Dawson in P Young- Eisendrath and T Dawson , The Cambridge Companion to Jung (Cambridge 1977) p 267,

The stage was set thereby for what Jung termed enantiodromia - the emergence of  repressed individuality from beneath the persona later in life.

the individual will either be completely smothered under an empty persona or an enantiodromia into the buried opposites will occur.

 ^ Barbara Hannah Striving towards Wholeness (Boston 1988)  p 263

Enantiodromia

It is a principle defined by Jung that the super abundance of any force inevitably produces its opposite. It is similar to the principle of equilibrium in the natural world, in that any extreme is opposed by the system in order to restore balance. When things get to their extreme. they turn into their opposite. In the repression of psychic forces that are there by cathected into something powerful and threatening. This is in the line of Yin-Yang of Taoism.

 PC Angelo Benuzzi- The Ourobos in the State

In particular, Jung used the term to refer to the unconscious acting against the wishes of the conscious mind, updating the Greek concept akrasia in modern psychological terms. (^Aspects of the Masculine chapter 7 para 294) .

Enantiodromia. literally 'running counter to' referring to the emergence of the unconscious opposite in the course time. The characteristic phenomenon practically always occurs when an extreme, one-sided tendency dominates conscious life. In time equally powerful counter-position is build up, which first inhibits the conscious performance and subsequently breaks through the conscious control.

(^"Definitions" ibid, par, 709)

Enantiodromia is typically experienced in conjunction with symptoms associated with acute neurosis and often foreshadows a rebirth of the personality.

The grand plan on which the unconscious life of the psyche is constructed is so inaccessible to our understanding that we can never know what evil may not be necessary in order to produce good by enantiodromia and what good may very possible lead to evil.

(^The Phenomenology of the Spirit in Fairy tales, Collected Works 9i par 397 )

Now 'In Giving We Receive' - How it helps to overcome the paradox of  persona ?   

Referring Bible; Luke 6:38 ESV 454 

Give and it will be given to you. Good measure , pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it, will be measured back to you.

Few more times 'giving and receiving' are referred in the Bible 

PC 4catholiceducators.com

Every act of obedience recognizes that there is a higher authority in our lives.. that there is Lord over us who is entitled to honor and respect. Due to our temperament, personality or circumstances. we may find some commands relatively easy to obey. Our submission is really tested in the areas where our own nature and situation make obedience more difficult. For most of us money is one of those areas. Our wallet is often the last citadel to fall to God's rule and even when it does fall, it gets rebuilt and re-secured again all too quickly. If only we could remember that Divine Lordship is not a threat; rather it's the place of  greatest safety.

In a video of Innana Sarkis, the philosophy of 'in giving we receive', is beautifully illustrated.

    

Final Thought

Undisturbed calmness of mind is attained by cultivating friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous and indifference toward the wicked.

Patanjali Yoga Aphorism I 33

If we meet someone who is happy in her/his way of life, we are inclined to envy her/him and be jealous to her/his success. We must learn to rejoice in it, as we take pleasure in the happiness of a friend. If someone is unhappy, we should feel for her/him, instead of despising her/him or criticizing her/him for bringing misfortunes upon herself/himself. The virtue of others is apt to irritate us, because we take it as a reflection upon our own shortcomings. We are tempted to sneer at it and suggest that it is only hypocrisy. On the contrary we should delight in it and see it as an inspiration to ourselves to do better. As for the wicked, we must remember Christ's words :

Be not overcome of evil

If someone harms us or hate us, our first instinct is to answer her/him with hatred and injury. We may succeed in injuring her/him, but we shall be injuring ourselves much more, and our hatred will throw our own minds into confusion. So we must practice indifference toward the hurts we receive from others. We must go behind the wickedness of the wicked and try to understand what makes them treat us in that way. Very often we shall discover that we ourselves are partly to blame for their attitude.

Not to further complicate the discussion, we find that every act of giving weakens and even breaks our sinful and selfish nature, the more blissful grace spreads in our hearts. Yes money or kind leaves our pockets, but also sin leaves our hearts. That is a great deal, priceless actually.

Our proper approach toward our fellow human beings is summed up in one of the first of monastic vows:

The bees seek honey. I will shun the habit of the flies and follow that of the bees. I will refrain from finding faults in others and look only for the good. which is in them.

That is a vow which we should all take and try to live up to.